Your horoscope

A non-zodaic-specific horoscope for you today (courtesy of Andy Zaltzman):

With the moon once again aligned with bits of the sky and the sun pointing outwards, with Jupiter in one of its gassy phases, you could be set to drink a cup of tea or other liquid at some point next week, while someone you know fails to tell you about something they didn’t think was really worth bothering you with. Be careful not to eat poisonous berries or jump into a crocodile pit at your local zoo – with Pluto still further away than Mars, and Saturn as big as it normally is, that will only end badly.

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